You may not have had a successful marriage, but you can have a successful divorce. Divorcing with dignity is possible. The key is maintaining perspective, remembering what is important, and looking at the big picture. The five pieces of advice discussed here are very important to remember as you decide that divorce is right for you.
Focus on the Family
Focus on the healthy restructuring of the family, and do not underestimate the impact divorce has on children of all ages. Be mindful that divorce can distract from a parent’s ability to focus on a child’s needs and feelings. It is also tempting to disparage the other parent, weaponize information, or blow mistakes made by the other parent out of proportion. Not only does this adversely impact the child, the court looks on this type of behavior disapprovingly. In most cases, your child needs (and loves) both parents, regardless of how the parents feel about each other.
Prioritize Your Property Needs and Wants
No one gets everything they want in a divorce. It is common that you and your soon-to-be-ex spouse to want to keep the same sentimental or big-ticket items. Unless you are planning on selling everything and splitting the proceeds, you must find an agreeable way to divide your property. It is recommended that you create a list of things you must have, items that would be nice to have, and items that can be let go. This will help you negotiate more effectively as well as come to terms with what gaps you need to fill in later. A divorce attorney can also assist you with how Ohio views property division.
Avoid Making Emotional Decisions
Acknowledge emotions but do not make emotional decisions. Going through a divorce comes with an array of certain feelings: shock, guilt, grief, anger, anxiety, and fear. Additionally, there are certain good emotions that come from divorce, depending on the circumstances. Know that the effects of the decisions you make during divorce last a lot longer than the emotions that you experience. Take careful consideration as you make decisions and agree to proposals. As needed, bounce your ideas and your pro and con list off someone you trust, someone who is likely more objective than you are during a time like this.
Take Care of Yourself
Divorce can feel all-consuming but try to remember that it is not the only thing going on in your life. You still must work, take care of your family, and, to do all of that, you must take care of yourself mentally and physically.
- Offer yourself some kindness and grace as you go through your day. Manage your expectations of yourself.
- Get out and be active! Physical activity releases tension and eases anxiety.
- Rediscover who you are. For so long your identity has been tied to another person; take on a new hobby, meet new friends, and try other new things.
Assemble the Right Support Team
Divorce can feel isolating and lonely. It is important to remember that you do not have to go through the process in a vacuum. Assemble the right team of support.
- Consider hiring a counselor or therapist who can help you process your feelings and emotions as you tackle this very big experience.
- It’s okay to rely on trusted friends and family to help you stay centered, being careful not to put mutual friends in an awkward spot.
- Hire a skilled Divorce Attorney. Rely on them for practical legal advice that comes from their experience in domestic relations and family matters.